chiquitas spot

Archive for the ‘rants’ Category

I  have three brothers: two natural one adopted in the sense that his ol man and mine are brothers . He(third brother) came to live with us when he was 11 years ol.d how that happened is that his mum found greener pastures in the form of a richer, uglier man than my uncle and she just upped divorced him and left …my uncle being heartbroken and in the navy had no time to take care of achild so that’s how we had an older brother.
We (me N Him) connect with him on a different level than the rest because we shared a traumatic childhood together…for him it was his mum just abandoning him and mine was more or less the same except mine had gone to studyand at least i got an occasional call and i-love you- …even though he was five years older we became inseparable. Moving on…my cousin/brother( Jay )lived with us until he was thru with campo got his first job and moved out…fortunately or unfortunately his ol man died and left him some inheritance and by stroke of luck or something Jay started a business that became a success overnight…this meant free booze and ice cream for yours truly until she came along….

she (gold digger -) wasn’t a jaw dropper in the looks department in any way, definitely not something to write home about …
Jay was the total babe magnet before she got her claws on him…maybe I was jealous but seriously, she worked her number until Jay was singing her name…let me count the ways she controlled him: he couldn’t go out anymore with me or the boys, she kept tabs on him (calling every hour)and at the end of the day ask for a recap from him and he’d have to fill in the empty time spaces, she’d go thru his phone book and call any chick she found suspect and tell her(crudely) to stay away from my “her” man (one time she threatened my sister who is a pyscho and boy was that funny ;)) as if that wasnt annoying enough she quit her jobbo and went to boss Jay’s employees until they threatened to quit. above all she was disrespectful to my folks who Jays sees as his parents.

we all cried out and tried warning Jay but he wouldn’t hear a word we said citing the four letter word…then as if to spite us one day she found an apartment asked Jay to pay, bought everything new (Jays money) and somehow they moved in together ,just like that…now Jay was her puppet and she was controlling the strings /he’d swallowed the bait hook ,line and sinker.There was no way to getting to him.

she had orchestrated her plans to the last dot…there is this time when I was in Uganda and my brothers had come visiting ..She called him every hour accusing him of sleeping around and even called me hurling matusis ati i was pimping him to my Ugandan pals! Being the gentleman he was he’d listen then baby her…(this boy is just special) if she thought I was of the same temperament boy was she in for some shock. I went ghetto on her over the phone until she apologized and we ended that conversation by me asking her to never ever call me….

so anywho she continued living with Jay and spending his cash it was raining from the sky…when my old man saw this he encouraged Jay to officalise their union at least this way we’d be sure she wasn’t in it for the money…she reluctantly agreed and said she’d organize…for some reason we didn’t know her family except her sister so this way we’d meet them .Kao tradition dictates that the dudes family should go to the chicks and introduce themselves and state their intentions luckily was a kyuk so we shared that tradition…
so my ol man organized this with his relaz and a date was set .a week before it was supposed to go down the chick cancelled ..Saying that her folks said they had other commitments that couldn’t wait and moved that date to the next month, which became many more months until my folks gave up.

What she did next only surprised Jay, the rest of us saw it coming. One day he comes home and finds his apartment empty…she had only left his clothes.(only because he has no taste in clothes) Mattress, bed, tv,kitchenware…everything gone! Plus she cleaned out an account they shared…to say Jay was devastated would be the understatement of the year; he was completely crushed not because she fleeced him but because he thought she loved him! Seriously how?

Later he traced her and tried getting his stuff back but he couldn’t because she had bought everything in her name…Jay never saw the harm in this because he thought they’d get hitched. When he asked her her why she did it she just gave an evil laugh….

My brother is still healing but he wont let any chick near him at all .
Just the other day on my home On munene Nyagas show a guy called in with a similar story saying that the chick was From kabete where Jays chick was from. a few other guys called in complaining about kabete mamas and their gold digging antics…this got me thinking when the rest of us were being grilled to work hard and get our own stuff what were they being taught: how to cut off a mans balls?

Second question how do you live with yourself after you destroy someone like that?….

qoute for the week:
throw out an alarming alarm clock.if the ring is loud and strident,you are waking up to instant shouldn’t be bullied out of bed ,just reminded that its time to start your day.
sharon Goff


so the holiday is over 😦

Am back to whatever I do.and from the look of things This going to be a very a loong bad/dreadful week.

while i was away seems some people were patriotic , idle or how else would you explain the 253 forwards in one of my email address?53 of these are hate mail for PNU and ODM/RAILA….

AfterI sift thru the political hate I come to the Kaz nude pics! all from jamaaz…i just dont get it ….why would someone rejoice at anothers misfortune?the incident reminded me of a chick in campo who dumped the boyfie who in turn pasted her nude pics in all the cybers and and notice boards.The idiot even had volunteers to paint the notice boards naked……the gal was traumatised especially since the pics did there rounds faster than a bushfire and everywhere she turned people pointed,jeered and some making bold overtures…she was forced to see a shrink until she was in fifth year.

A guy who does that sort of thing is as little as they come and in my opinion they should consult Dr.frank Njenga and two of his buddies at go………

Anywhoo..i had a blast and managed to do many things from my to-do-list…like doing me :)and finally went to see the cheetah park in Athi river,finally stopped using my crutch and the hardest: officialy being introduced to Mr Brys folks(was that wierd or what?…….details later) they seemed to like me and that had led to a few wierd questions like:‘when had you planned to get hitched or how many children do you plan on having?’what was i saying? yes am freaked out……..

I also managed hang out with one of the two teenage-mothers-to-be we became fast friends especially now since none of her agemates want nothing to do with her.her baby is due in a month and somehow she had hidden this fact from her folks.and i sort of advised her to tell her mom who in turn flipped her lid and threw her out,being the “good” person i am..i housed her and acted as the go between mum and daughter.she finally moved back home and working on her relationships with the folks,choosing baby names and doing whatever else mothers-to be do.

am into cologne big time and i convinced ,confused a pal to get me a victoria-don-tell-nobody perfume..and sijui am not feeling it……
this has been one long morning…managed to blog and go for my last Hepattis B jab (my left hand feels like i was being punched..)am off to the othorpeadic surgeon who sliced me up and hopping this will be it.

I have been thinking…do you know how easy it is to cheat and not get caught? and no i didn’t do it …

Baba Cedric was my neighbor upto until a year ago. He didn’t move on his own accord though, one day his missus and him decided, “to reduce each others matharau” and fought outside while the whole block watched. Talk about washing your dirty linen in public! Some folks had to cover their tois eyes coz he ripped his wife’s dress until she was half naked .

I had never seen anyone beat up their wife before this.

The couple had two-step kids (mama Cedric came with one and Baba Cedric the other) and one of their own )

Where was i? ah yes … of the step-sons (the mathes) ingilaid the fight ,hurling more x-rated obsenities than his parents combined and he had exchaged a few blows with him before the watchy and other neighbors stopped the family feud.

Needless to say that was just one ugly scene and the family was evicted the next day, and as shameless as they are they moved to the next-door apartments (still intact) so technically we are still neighbors. And meet from time to time ,say hi and move on….

So, on Saturday am at the common kiosk and Ba Cedric comes to buy gaf and we exchange niceties. As expected I ask about his family and he opens Pandora’s box and informs me that the wife had moved out like the month before after another of their ugly fights and he had tried to get her back home but she was “feeling sweet for him” but assured me that she would be home before the month is up .He asks me back to his house for a drink and I politely decline, he then asks me to meet later for drink which I also decline. At this point am not liking him very much and start to walk away then he informs me that he’d come call me when he got home in the evening so we could keep each other company…(I don’t know how to express the emotion I was feeling at that moment so I just walk away-is there a stronger word than loathe?) about thirty minutes later am out with Leo (Mr. bryjoe) and decide to go back to his place for the night.

Later Ba cedric sends me a text that says” si you are coming tu spend the night with me? Am ready for you ”wtf!….

Thank God Leo doesn’t touch my phone.

I reply with a “ when hell freezes over!!!!” and he still doesn’t get the point And texts back with a ” kwani you are shy? Basi wacha I come to your house” .
Am guessing he went to my house and missed my behind and that’s when he called for like 15 mins before giving up.

Am still seething wondering how such an idiot is allowed to breath the same air as everyone else.and no i have never in the past flirted or gotten textual with Ba Cedric…

On to other manenos:

I met the strangest jungu lady on Sunday. She is my Ol mans pal and she told me her Dogs were named after parents. Then I asked her who she named her kids after she says she preferred dogs to popping kids.(no kids) Then I asked another why and she said something like this:

{Sweetie ,why anyone has children is beyond me, you get everything from a dog you’d get from a child ,plus total acceptance and absolute gratitude .I have never met a grateful child. have you?}

At this point my dad was laughing his head off saying he understood what she meant….only on Gods green earth!

ps. my latest blog did a dissapearing act and i wasn’t able to retrieve it as i had d typed it online

pps.i finally told Leo i loved him..and no i didnt get off BT…

ppps..aint love grand ?

Am totally obsessed with this guy (John Stephens)can someone get me his number?