random manenos…

Posted by: bryjoe on: February 6, 2008

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February(still cant pronounce right after all this years) is here, it my favorite month of the year that cos I make resolutions on by birthday, it’s the only month I eat chocolate like there is no tomorrow plus this is the only valentine my whole life that I have a date  🙂

Back to matters at hand :I was convinced that our politicians are the biggest loosers until I met this guy .he will be referred to as Kama from here on. I met Kama on Friday last week at around 2am in a hospital Emergency room.what was I doing there? Well my “loving sister” who works in a hosi asked me to deliver some food and I went so while am chilling for her to malizana with her “watejas” a frenzied crowd comes in carrying a unconscious man. There is no time to take him to private consultation so the consultation is heard by anyone who cared to listen:

DOC: whats his name?

Kamas friends: kama

DOC:what happened?

KF: amekunywa sumu

Doc: Kuna mtu anajua amekunya nini?

KF: POWERTAB…

DOC: kwa nini?

KF*with a very expression* dio asimwe na mosquioto(say this with an accent)

*giggles from eaves droppers including me *

From here on it look like a scene On ER .my sister also appears screaming some instructions.then the drama begins. All I can say is that there was a lot of retching and liquids everywhere. a very nauseating site but Kama lived to tell the story. Apparently his wife was “stressing him” because she had wanted out and he saw death the only alternative. I shouldn’t be making light of such a situation considering my best friend committed suicide by drinking poison too. but surely if someone doesn’t want to love you back si there is something called moving on?anywhoo…kama is alive n well oh and a massive hospital bill for his ass to pay .

If you need drama in Ur life id suggest you hang out in an emergency room and you wont be disappointed .

After Kama there was a guy who was brought in with his lower lip bitten off by the guy who brought him to hospital. when the patient was in consultation I was busy listening eaves dropping  to the guy and a hysterical(yeah bila aibu)girl tell thier plas what went down.

people have problems  but not for clothes( watu wana shida na siza nguo) I tell you. so this guy the biter going out with chick A lets call her sugar. let me begin from the top. sugar and bitee(guy who’s lip is gone)have been going out for a year and he recently even bought her a nokia N series phone but sugar decides to broaden horizons and has boyfi no2 who is the biter.

so on Friday Sugar is at the club with biter after calling earlier on to make sure bitee wasn’t around…lakini somewhere in the rave the water exceeded the floor(maji ikazidi unga)when Bitee shows up at the club with the boys and finds Sugar lip locked with biter in the club.an argument followed and sugar couldn’t stop it and  Biter and bitee ended up weighing each others strength(pimanaing nguvu) or if you like reducing each other madharau and somehow biter ended up biting bitees  lower lip .

 unluckily ,for  bitee ,they couldn’t stitch his bitten lip(which had been wrapped ).They could only stop the bleeding.poor guy  he has to live the rest of his life with saliva dribbling freely unless he can afford reconstruction surgery which costs and arm and a leg.Lil miss sugar cried what seemed like a river but no one consoled her…each guy (biter and bitee)had come with their pals but the poor thing didn’t have anyone to talk to considering they were calling her very deragory names like she wasn’t there.i wish I knew what happened to the couple(s) later 

My point exactly?love isnt love that tortures or tormments to that point .oh…. and yes my sis still ate the food like nothing she hadnt seen anything worth loosing her appetite for.

To other news am soliticing for girlfriends.Yeah like women …I was stock taking and  realised that I don’t have a chick I can really call “girlfriend “all i  have are chicks who are either neighbours or workmates no one I can call for ice cream or call just some gossip.so girlfriend outhere hala!…I seriously  need to stop hanging out with dudes or by my lonesome.

 ok well there is always that  sinister/selfish motive.i need someone to surpise me with a bridal shower…for real..i went for the one and only brial shower I have been to and I didn’t even know that chick I crushed (thru the ever with-it sister) and since the commitment ring has been donned am thinkin like way way ahead…well sure I have been to a stag night but its not as much fun as a bridal shower ..well for me anyway..all those activities get tired after sometime.but at the bridal shower you get to hear some truths about  marriage that freak the hell out of you,marrige I learnt here Is an oxymoron. And nothing I thought it would be  esp since am sort of opinionated selfish an and the advise this women gave translated to me sounded like “you have to be door mat -ish”:something i gave up a while.

lastly,my friend is taking trying to get me to break-up with this gal who he thought was a klande but she apparently  fell dangerously in love with him *smh* because she is clingier than  a wet T-shirt and he isnt feeling her.while he is foing that the klande is calling me trying to get me to get my pal to see she is the woman of his dream.how two adults can still play hide and seek like this is beyond me..my stand? am not being a Kofi Anan for anyone .

lastly kabisa:i have given up alchol.

have a good week all!

say your payers esp for kenya.