so anywhoo….. lets see if I can still express myself:

OK,so I have this pal (Karl)i met pal through a blind date….. long story short :we didn’t have the chemistry so we did ourselves the ultimate favor and became very good friends . That he was until a few months ago when met him in very unfamiliar territory let me start from the beginning:I told y’all that one of my best friends is gay and through him I have met many other men and women and they always invite me to go to this gay bashes every month(its surprising this is no longer a big thing like before when the location was a secret)…back to this bash so this Friday my gay pal(Josh) insists on taking me to this bash and I agreed to tag along .since I stopped drinking I don’t go out as much but this parties are fun because I entertain myself by observing the faboulosity of outfits worn especially by the men and the boy dramas that happen(believe me no series can match this)so ,am busy chatting and hugging the my friends I glance and see this two guys locking lips and I stare for the whole 2 minutes ….and when they pull apart who do I see? None other than my very homophobic pal Josh!.

After I picked up my jaw from the floor I mingle not sure whether I should say hi and I decide against it and walk around until I “crushed into” Josh at the bar and the expression on his face is priceless….then he goes like “omg! I always knew you were gay!that’s why you didn’t want to go out with me”

Bry: puleezze!don’t flatter yourself…am here with Josh so what are you doing here anyway?

Karl: you caught me on my way out…i didn’t know what kind of party this was..this is my home pub and I didn’t know they tolerated this kind of filth here (yeah right!is that’s why you paid at the entrance?)

Bry :oh ,how come you moved and you didn’t tell me? Karl:you know….jobbo plus I have been have been busy

Bry: oh OK..so I guess I’ll see you kawaida place next week -we go for     Ethiopian once a month

Karl:sasawa we’ll talk .

At this point its very obvious that lunch never happened and we have been having this weird conversations on facebook and chat…he tried to bring up the topic but I brushed him away because I don’t think he owes me an explanation and I guess am pissed at him for telling me I’ll go to hell for being an “enabler” because I didn’t try to tell my gay friends what they were doing was wrong when all this time he was dipping his finger in the cookie jar…such is life.

Later  people.

so yeah ,i missed you and i hope this time tomorrow i have something(anything really) to write about.

later,

Bryjoe

st 18, 2008

Iwont post the rules since we all know them by heart

here goes: 

1. Ihad penile envy for the longest time.
2. Ihave issues with my legs:am flat footed so everyone can tell when am going or coming    since i make a patter patter sound,my tumagoroes are way way lighter than my face so when am in something short i end up getting funny looks like no-you didnt-bleach-your-legs-and-forgot-to-do-the-face
3. I waited till i was 24 to have sex.
4  I get very anal when am javing and someone spills over to my seat.i mean why bother to  divide the seats if you are going to seat anywhere anyway?
5. my natural hair is curly and soft.and they made me cut it in high school(now you know why i dont miss that School)only for it to grow back curlier than ever…
6.when i first started reading novels i listed them until i got to # 1000 since then i think i have trippled the amount coz i read absolutely anything i come across plus I have my own library which was started by my dad when i was 11.

i wont tag anyone since tume jizinguka .

yeah its my birthday!

am so so excited!!!!!!

can you feel the enthusiam? before anyone starts spreading any rumours let me just state that am still in my mid twenties

am currently on vacation and am seeing people are tagging me.so i’ll get back to y’all in a week or two….

in other news am just from a wedding where this guy(kenyan and bride(rwandese)exchanged thier first kiss at the alter! so am thinking how do this people profess there love?if you dont belive i’ll post thier website soon you see for you self.

ps.i caught the boquet but a chic wrestled it from and i have this scar on my wrist to show for it .

so happy birthday me! hope you have many more and you make smart resolutions.have a good weekend all.

pps.happy birthday UNYC i think yours was today.no?

February(still cant pronounce right after all this years) is here, it my favorite month of the year that cos I make resolutions on by birthday, it’s the only month I eat chocolate like there is no tomorrow plus this is the only valentine my whole life that I have a date 

Back to matters at hand :I was convinced that our politicians are the biggest loosers until I met this guy .he will be referred to as Kama from here on. I met Kama on Friday last week at around 2am in a hospital Emergency room.what was I doing there? Well my “loving sister” who works in a hosi asked me to deliver some food and I went so while am chilling for her to malizana with her “watejas” a frenzied crowd comes in carrying a unconscious man. There is no time to take him to private consultation so the consultation is heard by anyone who cared to listen:

DOC: whats his name?

Kamas friends: kama

DOC:what happened?

KF: amekunywa sumu

Doc: Kuna mtu anajua amekunya nini?

KF: POWERTAB…

DOC: kwa nini?

KF*with a very expression* dio asimwe na mosquioto(say this with an accent)

*giggles from eaves droppers including me *

From here on it look like a scene On ER .my sister also appears screaming some instructions.then the drama begins. All I can say is that there was a lot of retching and liquids everywhere. a very nauseating site but Kama lived to tell the story. Apparently his wife was “stressing him” because she had wanted out and he saw death the only alternative. I shouldn’t be making light of such a situation considering my best friend committed suicide by drinking poison too. but surely if someone doesn’t want to love you back si there is something called moving on?anywhoo…kama is alive n well oh and a massive hospital bill for his ass to pay .

If you need drama in Ur life id suggest you hang out in an emergency room and you wont be disappointed .

After Kama there was a guy who was brought in with his lower lip bitten off by the guy who brought him to hospital. when the patient was in consultation I was busy listening eaves dropping  to the guy and a hysterical(yeah bila aibu)girl tell thier plas what went down.

people have problems  but not for clothes( watu wana shida na siza nguo) I tell you. so this guy the biter going out with chick A lets call her sugar. let me begin from the top. sugar and bitee(guy who’s lip is gone)have been going out for a year and he recently even bought her a nokia N series phone but sugar decides to broaden horizons and has boyfi no2 who is the biter.

so on Friday Sugar is at the club with biter after calling earlier on to make sure bitee wasn’t around…lakini somewhere in the rave the water exceeded the floor(maji ikazidi unga)when Bitee shows up at the club with the boys and finds Sugar lip locked with biter in the club.an argument followed and sugar couldn’t stop it and  Biter and bitee ended up weighing each others strength(pimanaing nguvu) or if you like reducing each other madharau and somehow biter ended up biting bitees  lower lip .

 unluckily ,for  bitee ,they couldn’t stitch his bitten lip(which had been wrapped ).They could only stop the bleeding.poor guy  he has to live the rest of his life with saliva dribbling freely unless he can afford reconstruction surgery which costs and arm and a leg.Lil miss sugar cried what seemed like a river but no one consoled her…each guy (biter and bitee)had come with their pals but the poor thing didn’t have anyone to talk to considering they were calling her very deragory names like she wasn’t there.i wish I knew what happened to the couple(s) later